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Forgiveness. I’m about to bust some myths that you have about forgiveness.

And then give you a key that is going to set you free. Forever.

Time for some myth busting…

#1: It is impossible to forgive.

FALSE.

It is completely possible to forgive. The only thing stopping you is your own anger and hurt. When you are ready to let go of that anger and hurt, you are able to forgive. I know it’s not easy, but it is possible. You just have to want freedom more than you want to hold on to the anger.

#2: They have to ask for forgiveness.

FALSE.

Forgiveness isn’t for the other person. It is for you. Forgiveness lightens YOUR load. Forgiveness means letting go of a past trauma that is holding you back. Forgiveness means “I’m ready to move on and move up”. It isn’t for them. It is for YOU.

#3: What they did doesn’t deserve forgiveness.

FALSE.

Forgiveness doesn’t CONDONE what they did. It also doesn’t mean that you have to let that person back into your life. You can forgive and have boundaries. Boundaries that leave them and what they did in the past. Forgiveness means recognising that they are human and made a mistake. It means that you are no longer going to allow that mistake to take up any energy in your life.

 

Are you ready to forgive? Are you ready to put down your anger and allow space for gratitude, love and happiness to enter your heart? If so, then you can use the following letter to release the hurt and send forgiveness. You don’t have to physically send this letter. It can feel good to just write it out and then burn it. You can add to it, change it however you want. As long as the overall gist is “I forgive you, I love you, let’s move on” you will be on the right path.

Forgiveness Letter

Dear *insert name here*,

I write this because I am ready to forgive you. I am ready to put down the sword of anger I have been holding towards you and instead offer an olive branch of peace.

I have been hurt and upset by your actions. I feel that what you did went against my own values and beliefs. It is now in the past. It isn’t how I choose to define myself moving forward.

I recognise that you are human and as humans, we make mistakes.

I recognise that you acted in the best way you knew at that time. I cannot say that I would’ve acted differently if I was in the same situation, with your experience, beliefs and values.

I recognise that we are both different people now and we will continue to grow, evolve and learn. Our past experiences shape our future and I have learned alot from what happened. I am grateful for the lesson.

I forgive you. I forgive what you did.

I am sorry for my role in what happened. Relationships are a two way street and I need to accept responsibility for my part, whatever that may have been.

I forgive myself.

And finally, I love you. I see that you are a perfectly flawed, unique, special human. Just as I am a perfectly flawed, unique, special human. Both trying to do our best and live our best lives.

I wish you nothing but love and happiness in your future. I wish myself the same.

Take care,

From *insert name here*

 

Take a deep breath. You can do this. Forgiveness is the release you are looking for. It is the ultimate block that, once removed, will change your life forever.

 

For more advice and coaching on how to move forward from past trauma, sign up to my daily e-newsletter.

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